dennys:

"Mmmmmmm." - Michael, age 42

dennys:

"Mmmmmmm." - Michael, age 42

drakefanclub:

whoever made these is going to jail. i aint playin games here

snh-snh-snh:

I keep thinking oh man, I’m so immature. How am I allowed to be an adult.

Then I spend time with teenagers.

And it’s like, wow, okay, yeah. I am an adult. I am so adult. Look at me adulting all over the place.

livinginawhitegirlsparadise:

sometimes you just gotta white girl dance your problems away

tfwnoarms:

pearswhy:

potterlovermore:

pearswhy:

what if you bit someones teeth

what

WHAT IF YOU USED YOUR OWN TEETH TO BITE THE TEETH OF SOMEBODY ELSE?????

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arrogantdad:

my mom told me that in high school she use to get boyfriends at the beginning of February so they had enough time to get her a valentines day gift and then break up with them the day after and just keep the gift and one day she told her parents about it and they made her keep her boyfriend at least until the end of February and so she did and that boy is now my dad

serialkilling-things:

Elizabeth Bathory tortured and killed hundreds of women between 1590-1610. Her torture methods included:
beating the servant girls with a heavy cudgel 
sticking pins into the upper and lower lips of the girls, into other parts of their flesh, and under their fingernails 
having the women stripped naked and forcing them to perform their household duties in full view of men
forcing the servants to go on fasts with nothing to eat or drink for days 
forcing the servants to go on fasts with nothing to eat or drink for days 
having cold water poured over naked girls, while they were outside in the cold and snow, until they froze to death 
having girls submerged in a frozen river in winter 
having iron keys and coins heated red-hot and forcing girls to hold them 
having naked girls smeared with honey and then forcing them to stand outside for twenty-four hours and endure bites from insects 
lacing paper between the girls’ toes and setting it on fire (called “star kicking”)
putting her fingers into one girl’s mouth and pulling until it split at the corners 
setting pubic hair on fire 
thrusting the hot iron into the face of the servant if a collar was not properly pressed 
scorching girls with fiery swords or tongs 
pouring scalding water on servant girls 
biting and ripping out the flesh of the servants 
cutting off fingers with scissors 
Sources: https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20070518113604AAw2rgb
The Encyclopedia of Serial Killers by Michael Newton

Crazy motherfuckin’ lady yo

serialkilling-things:

Elizabeth Bathory tortured and killed hundreds of women between 1590-1610. Her torture methods included:

  • beating the servant girls with a heavy cudgel 
  • sticking pins into the upper and lower lips of the girls, into other parts of their flesh, and under their fingernails 
  • having the women stripped naked and forcing them to perform their household duties in full view of men
  • forcing the servants to go on fasts with nothing to eat or drink for days 
  • forcing the servants to go on fasts with nothing to eat or drink for days 
  • having cold water poured over naked girls, while they were outside in the cold and snow, until they froze to death 
  • having girls submerged in a frozen river in winter 
  • having iron keys and coins heated red-hot and forcing girls to hold them 
  • having naked girls smeared with honey and then forcing them to stand outside for twenty-four hours and endure bites from insects 
  • lacing paper between the girls’ toes and setting it on fire (called “star kicking”)
  • putting her fingers into one girl’s mouth and pulling until it split at the corners 
  • setting pubic hair on fire 
  • thrusting the hot iron into the face of the servant if a collar was not properly pressed 
  • scorching girls with fiery swords or tongs 
  • pouring scalding water on servant girls 
  • biting and ripping out the flesh of the servants 
  • cutting off fingers with scissors 

Sources: https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20070518113604AAw2rgb

The Encyclopedia of Serial Killers by Michael Newton

Crazy motherfuckin’ lady yo

spmib:

stop-hodoring:

Top Gear in India 

How can you not like top gear?

I watched this the other week and was in literal tears

plasticbagvevo:

when you hear somebody talking about one of your interests

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stacylaynematthews:

and you wonder how i stole your man sweetie(:

stacylaynematthews:

and you wonder how i stole your man sweetie(:

neyruto:

i had the most surreal experience of my life at the mall i was standing by one of those god forsaken meme t-shirt stands and a sweaty pre-teen boy pointed to a shirt and yelled “gandam style” and started to half-heartedly do the dance without taking his eyes off of the shirt. his face was so red. he was tired.

ugly:

trying to teach your friend how to ride a bike

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